ORIGINAL AD

PIGEONS OR DOVES
$5 per each

On Fri, May 13, 2011 at 1:10 AM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

I want like 4-5 of these guys for a movie shoot, what do you say ? 

 

On Fri, May 13, 2011 at 8:41 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

its okey for me for this price when can u come and check these guys? 

On Fri, May 13, 2011 at 8:47 PM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

My producer just told me we'll need like 150 of these fuckers for the scene with the mutilated birds. How many can you truck over to me by tomorrow ? 

Also, we need somebody to play the bird-keeper. It's a paid featured role, you interested ? 

On Sat, May 14, 2011 at 3:46 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

yes sure i interesting maybe we have 10 or 15 pieces but i dont know exactly 818 ### #### this is my number call me 

On Sun, May 15, 2011 at 12:09 AM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

10 or 15 pieces ? no i need them whole, my friend, don't cut them up just yet. And we need more like 150. 

So you're interested in the bird-keeper role, eh ? Excellent man, we can't pay too much it's not a main role, so it'll only be about $600 a day. Unless there's overtime, of course, in which case it doubles. We shoot for about a week in June, 6-8 hours a day. How comfortable are you with nudity ? 

On Sun, May 15, 2011 at 12:48 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

its okey but what kind of nudity? 

On Sun, May 15, 2011 at 1:40 PM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

Oh it's all pretty vanilla stuff, nothing fancy. You'll be playing a rapist bird-killer, so right after the scene where you mutilate and kill the birds with your bare hands we'll do the nudity scene. 

That one really depends on your acting talent, to be honest, but we'd have to convey the fact that you're aroused by all the carnage. (think Jack Nicholson from The Shining). If you aren't actually aroused by mutilated dead pigeons, then we'll have to use props, like yogurt for the semen etc, but it would be really great if the scene was all natural. 

Also with 150 live birds we can do like 10-15 takes, so you'll have plenty of time to get the mutilation and rape scenes just right. Worst case we'll just get some more birds. 

On Sun, May 15, 2011 at 1:59 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

its okey.sounds everything good.is it a commercial or movie? 

On Mon, May 16, 2011 at 2:02 AM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

It's actually a Geico commercial that will air in Europe. 

I forgot to ask you, will you have any problems killing the birds with your bare hands ? Because otherwise we'll need to spend an additional $2500-3000 on special effects, and I'd rather just give some of that to you and embezzle the rest. 

On Mon, May 16, 2011 at 7:04 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

Its okey i can do it with my bare hands.but i have a question where gonna be the movie shoot and when exactly because i have to know that. 

On Tue, May 17, 2011 at 8:45 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

ohhh and i almost forget that its not gonna be problem????(i gonna kill birds.....) 

On Tue, May 17, 2011 at 9:24 PM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

It's only gonna be a problem for the birds -- ha, ha, you know what I'm sayin ? 

Speaking of which, I told the producer you're more than happy to murder and rape these birds and he got pretty excited. He went off and called some people and got us half a dozen turkeys, a few chickens, and a small hawk. 

We were thinking for the hawk you could rip his head off and eat it during the final scene. You don't have to actually chew or swallow if you don't want to, but it'd save us a ton on the special effects, which we can split with you. The chickens you don't even have to kill, just choke and sodomize them a little. And since we'll be shooting all that in the nude we bought some animal tranquilizer so that these guys don't fight back too much, although a little scratching and blood will be good for the scene, to be honest. 

And don't worry, it's all questionably legal -- the hawk was gonna be put down anyway by an animal control shelter because it turned on and disfigured its owner, so we're basically honoring it instead of wasting its life. 

We're shooting one of the first two weeks in June in LA, and the dates haven't been set yet. When are you available ? 

On Wed, May 18, 2011 at 9:17 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

so the first deal was the pigeons and kill them.......for $ 2500-3000.is it gonna be for more money? 

On Sat, May 21, 2011 at 5:35 PM, Jimmy D <l..@...com> wrote:

Whoa hey asshole, I'm doing you a favor here, and you're trying squeeze me for a dollar ? 

I already said it's about a week of shooting at $600+ a day. That's gonna be between $3000 and $4200 right there, not including overtime. I've got 6 other assholes who emailed me willing to kill, rape and eat each other for that kind of money, never mind some damn birds. 

You gonna eat the hawk or not, you ungrateful prick ? 

On Sat, May 21, 2011 at 8:54 PM, Alejandro <a..@...com> wrote:

fuck u motherfucker ur a big asshole mug